The Trouble with Mom and Dad
by myfriendfiction
Summary: Having parents in politics is never easy and having Ben Wyatt and Leslie Knope as your parents means you will become very familiar with humiliation. The Knope Wyatt triplets have a lot of embarrassing scandals involving their parents to discover, among them: the bowling alley punch, cab makeouts, and nerdy pen pal letters.
1. Ice Town

**Chapter 1: Ice Town**

 **January 2018- Age 4- Pawnee- Ice Town**

So now that the campaign is about to be fully underway we need to discuss how we will deal with Ice Town." Jen Barkley stated.

"What's Ice Town Daddy?" Sonia asked as she and the two boys looked up at Ben.

"Oh, nothing. Nothing. Nothing. Just, uh a town made of Ice in the North Pole."

"Is it where Santa lives?" Wesley asked causing Stephen to stand up with a huge smile on his face.

"Ah, ah. Yeah. Yep. Okay why don't you go play in your room with your stuffed animals and think about what kind you want next."

"Yay!" the triplets shouted causing Jen to grimace and smooth out her poncho.

 **November 2020- Age 6- Partridge- Ice Clown**

"Daddy, when are we going to see an ice clown?" Sonia asked with her brothers standing beside her waiting for the answer.

"Where, where did you…did …you…hear that?"

"I don't remember," Sonia answered as her brothers nodded in agreement.

 **November 2022- Age 8- DC- Ice Town Never Dies**

The family was in Pawnee for the week of Thanksgiving. While Leslie was in a meeting at the Midwest Bureau of National Parks, her old job, the triplets were hanging out with Ben at his Pawnee office. They loved whenever they got to go to one of their parent's office and got to busy themselves with whatever tasks their parents could come up with. On this day they had been stuffing some envelopes. When they had left for lunch with Ben they were unexpectedly met with some angry protesters forcing Ben to once and for all explain Ice Town to his kids.

"Why were those people holding signs that said, "Go back to Ice Town Ice Clown," Wesley asked as he sat beside his dad in their favorite booth at JJ's Diner.

"Well, they were holding those signs so that I would see them. Sometimes people that daddy works for get angry at me. When I vote on things in DC some people are happy with the way I vote and some people are not happy. Those people were not happy. When I was eighteen, which is very young, still a kid really. I was elected mayor in Partridge where Grandma and Grandpa and Aunt Stephanie and your cousins live. I tried to build a place called Ice Town where people could ice skate and play hockey because people really love to do that kind of stuff in Minnesota. Anyways, Ice Town didn't work out. It went really wrong. It was a very bad thing so people were really mad at me and called me Ice Clown. So sometimes when people get mad at me they call me Ice Clown," Ben explained.

"Ice Clown, is that a real type of clown? I've never seen a clown made of ice," Stephen commented.

"You were a kid mayor!" Wesley exclaimed.

"That's so cool!" Sonia said grinning.

"Yes, I was a kid mayor but I did a terrible job! I made a lot of mistakes but I've learned from them and I haven't made the same mistakes again. And none of you are allowed to run for mayor until you're 35," Ben explained, "Promise me now and I'll buy you a stuff animal."

 **Up Next: Could Make An Angel Hang himself**


	2. Could Make an Angel Hang Himself

**Chapter 2: Could Make An Angel Hang Himself**

 **December 2024- Age 10- Pawnee-Could Make an Angel Hang Himself**

It was two days before Christmas and the triplets sat in front of the fireplace drinking coco and extra marshmallows while looking at old scrapbooks while their parents busied themselves in the kitchen preparing dinner while Christmas music filled the air and the snow fell outside.

"…..The bride wore a dress made by her friend Ann Perkins and the groom wore a butt so…so… perfect it could make an angel…. hang….. himself."

"Say what now?" Wesley exclaimed.

"The bride wore a dress made by her….." Stephen repeated.

"No. No. Stop. I was using a figure of speech," Wesley explained and then asked, "That's such a weird thing to say. Who wrote that article?"

"Mom. Mom wrote that article," Sonia said after leaning over Stephen to look at the article.

Wesley's voice got really low as he hung his head and confessed, "There's a pattern. I did see mom….grab dad's butt once or twice."

"I've seen it too. They're not good at being sneaky. It's really gross."

"Me too. I'm not so sure dad enjoys it. What do you both think?"

The other two gave Stephen a weird look before Sonia suggested, "Let's forget we ever had this conversation."

The three put one hand in and shouted, "Triple Power."

 **Up next, My Dearest Todo Toadfoot**


	3. My Dearest Todo Toadfoot

**Chapter 3: My Dearest Todo Toadfoot**

 **May 2025- Age 11-D.C.- My Dearest Todo Toadfoot, Love Dimple Broadbelt of Buckland**

Sonia sat down at her desk in the front of the Mrs. Belleview's classroom just as Ashely Houghton dropped a folded up piece of paper on her desk.

"What is this a note?" Sonia said to no one in particular, "What is 2011?"

Sonia unfolded it. She read it in bewilderment. Folded it back up and turned her attention to the teacher who had just started class.

Meanwhile Wesley, in the front of Mr. Tibbs, classroom was going over some notes when a message popped up with a link. The link said something about Lord of the Rings and fanfiction so it piqued Wesley's interest, he was currently reading The Lord of the Rings. Wesley's eyebrows rose as he quickly read the article before his teacher addressed the class.

Across the hall in Ms. Housley's room Stephen hurried to finish a homework assignment when he got distracted by his classmates chatter. "So Stephen what's your Lord of Rings name? Does your family sit around on Friday nights dressed as Hobbits?"

"That was just one Halloween," Stephen managed to say before his teacher came by and gave him a pointedly look seeing unfinished homework on his desk.

Later that day on the bus to go home as Stephen was walking down the aisle Wesley grabbed him by the shirt to get his attention telling him to sit down. Stephen took his seat next to Wesley and saw that Sonia was sitting across the aisle.

"So did something weird happen to you today?" Wesley asked.

"Involving Lord of the Rings?" Sonia added.

"Um,… oh yeah. I was asked if our family dressed up as hobbits. I told them that was only one time last year for Halloween.

"We were informed of "pen pal letters that mom and dad wrote to each other as their fantasy Lord of the Rings characters."

"I get the vibe that everyone thinks that's weird," Wesley stated.

"Me too." "Yeah."

"That's dumb. I mean they all knew it was related to Lord of the Rings. The new reimagined Lord of The Rings movie had a ginormous box office and they all saw the movie."

"It was way better than the old one by that Peter Jackson guy."

"Also, I may have dabbled in writing some similar letters to Oliver," Wesley confessed.

"So have I. Written them to Oliver," Sonia also shared.

Stephen then pulled out his Gryzzl tablet and started composing his own letter to Oliver.

 **Up Next: Molegate (aka Your mother has been involved in multiple sex scandals)**


	4. MoleGate

**Chapter 4: MoleGate (AKA: Your Mom Has Been Involved in More than One Sex Scandal)**

 **June 2027- Age 13- Pawnee- MoleGate**

Leslie heard two of her three kids scream and dropped the plate she was drying off, shattering it, and ran into the living room.

"What, what is it?"

"Eww," Wesley kept repeating as he dove face down onto the couch as Sonia paced the room.

What is it?" Leslie pleaded as she sat down on the couch next to Wesley and began rubbing his back in comfort which made him shriek away and begin pacing the room like his sister.

"Okay. Okay. We turned on the tv and Joan Callamezo was on sharing a story about two politicians that were caught in a sex scandal and Wesley and I were laughing at the story and then we found out that one of the politicians involved in it was you!"

"Oh, okay. Well, this was bound to come out eventually. Alright, I know it sounds bad and your father and I broke some rules and rule breaking is wrong but this is one of the very very very few exceptions where it worked out. And we had to pay the consequences. Your dad had to resign in disgrace and I lost my campaign managers but things worked out. I won the city council seat because your dad worked for me and ran my campaign and we got married and had the three of you."

Wesley and Sonia stood with their mouths hanging up in shock.

"You guys look like you're hearing this for the first time. You just heard it on tv."

"Apparently we were talking about your OTHER sex scandal. With Ex Councilman Dexhart. He was lying, correct, and you pulled your pants down to prove that you didn't have a mole on your butt exposing him as a liar?" Sonia slowly explained.

"Oh,….that sex scandal," Leslie nervously laughed.

"How many have you been involved with mother?" Wesley asked as he and Sonia stood side by side in front of their mother who sat facing them on the couch.

"Oh, just that one and the one with…your father. I swear. I swear on Pawnee's beloved mini horse Lil Sebastian."

"But the scandal with that Dexhart guy and dad, they were both just lies, right?" Sonia and Wesley echoed.

"The Dexhart scandal was a blatant lie. That's why I pulled my pants down on tv. And the scandal with your father and I…well…I might as well tell you since I accidently told you it exists…and it's only a matter of time before you see that on the news…Daddy and I were involved in a little bit of a thing…."

Sonia and Wesley gave Leslie the same look that Ben gives people when they're lying.

"Okay. You know the story about your dad and Uncle Chris coming to Pawnee. State auditor is a local government employee's worst nightmare. I'd write him like a hundred memos and beg for money for my department. And he just…he was crazy about me," Leslie explained smiling and seemed to get lost in her reminiscing.

"And," Sonia prodded.

"Oh, yeah. So your dad took a job as Assistant City Manager, making him my boss, technically."

"But if dad was in love with you why would he take a job as your boss?" Wesley asked.

"He wasn't in love with you yet?" Sonia asked.

"It was just complicated. And your dad's kind of an idiot about those things. Cute intelligent idiot. I might also be a little slow about those types of things."

"Good luck kids," Leslie whispered under her breath with a laugh.

"Okay," Leslie said refocusing, "So your dad and I tried to follow the rules. We weren't allowed to date but we really really really liked each other a lot a lot a lot a lot. But we tried to just wait for it to go away. It did not. So eventually, after much contemplation your father and I engaged in a secret relationship. We were going to figure out if we had something real and lasting and reassess. But after a few months I was approached about running for office. A scandal would hurt my campaign so your dad sweetly ended things and we tried to move on. But we didn't. We loved each other and wanted to be together and we felt so guilty about lying and breaking the rules so we decided to be together and it not be a secret. We confessed. There was an ethics trial. Your dad resigned from his job in effect it allowed me to keep my job because he accepted all responsibility and the heaviest consequences."

"Why didn't dad just quit his job and then you two could've gone public a few months later?" Wesley wondered aloud, "That's what I would've done."

"Or they could've just gotten married. I bet it wouldn't have been a scandal if they had just eloped. That's what I would've done," Sonia commented.

"But the moral of the story is…." Leslie began trying to rack her brain for the end of her sentence as Wesley and Sonia then started to walk out of the room and discussing how gross their mom and dad are but how they were kind of impressed that they were willing to break the rules to be together.

"Always follow the rules kids. Respect the rules but follow your heart but rules," Leslie squeaked out before giving up.

Leslie stood in the living room for a minute processing what had just happened and just as she started to walk towards the kitchen she was greeted by Ben that was just about to panic.

"I saw the broken plate on the floor but I didn't hear anyone around," Ben began, "Is everyone okay?"

"Oh…..yeah. Um the kids know about our sex scandal."

"Oh, crap. We're they talking about it on the news again? We probably should've told them about it so they heard from us and not the news but last time it came up the media said our sex scandal was too boring to ever bring up again. You never know what the media is going to bring up these days. So, how are they?"

"Yep, the kids found out about our sex scandal on the news. Those pesky reporters. They heard it from them not from me accidently telling them."

"Leslie."

"Okay, so the kids told me they heard about my sex scandal and I assumed they meant our sex scandal. So I started explaining it. Turns out they knew nothing about our sex scandal and they had discovered my completely fabricated sex scandal with Dexhart. So now they know about both. And they really understand how we faced the consequences and one should follow rules."

"Okay. Good. Wait, Leslie."

"Okay, so they didn't understand the moral of the story. How could I explain it to them? I don't regret it and I wouldn't have done anything differently."

"Same, but I don't want them thinking it's okay. I don't want them to grow up and have their own…scandals. Good lord, what if they follow in our footsteps?"

"I wish there was a manual for politicians about how to talk to your kids about your sex scandals. Have any politicians we know said anything to us?" Leslie asked.

"Um, oh. Once Bill Clinton said to me, "Benny can you hand me that napkin I dropped?" That's not helpful."

"God, your Bill Clinton impersonation is so sexy. I wanna climb you like a koala bear climbs a eucalyptus tree," Leslie declared before she passionately kissed her husband.

"By the way, I kind of still want to punch Dexhart," Ben confessed in between kisses.

"Crap, we're gonna have to tell them about when I punched that guy in the bowling alley."

"And when I shoved a pie in that woman's face," Leslie mentioned before heading back in for another series of kisses.

"Oh crap on a spatula, Stephen doesn't know about any of it. He's upstairs listening to music so he missed everything. Well, Ben I dealt with the other two so you're gonna have to talk to Stephen. Oh, that's the oven timer."

 **Up Next: Cab Driver Confessions**


	5. Cab Driver Confessons

**Chapter 5: Cab Driver Confessions**

 **September 2027- Age 13- D.C. - Cab Driver Confessions (And Acts of Aggression Were Also Confessed)**

"Oh my god, no wonder they have triplets. They're parents are animals," Sonia and Wesley overheard from a group of three classmates huddled together outside the biology lab. Sonia wished schools still had lockers and imagined herself slamming a locker door like she was in one those ancient teen 80s or 90s movies she watched with her mom. One of the three kids remarked, "Yeah, I guess Wyatt's a liberal after all."

The three classmates didn't even notice Sonia and Wesley in the noisy and crowded hallway. Sonia made a step forward as Wesley caught her arm and tried to drag her away causing the two to struggle in the hallway as the two pushed against each other.

"Hey, hey, hey, what is going on?" Stephen questioned trying to step in the middle of his siblings who in turn began pushing against him until he yelled, "Stop."

"Those kids were talking about our family," Sonia exclaimed pointing to the group of three as they were now walking down the hall.

"And I was trying to stop her. What are you going to do Sonia? Beat them up? You don't even really know what they're talking about."

"Well, I know they weren't praising our family. And one should be allowed to…..aggressively disagree with someone if that person is a jerk. And one of those kids is Alistair Smithson whose a huge hypocrite. He was kicked out of three private schools. He's so awful that his old family money wasn't enough to keep him in private school. His dad is constantly having affairs." Sonia explained.

"Let's find out what they're talking about. What have mom and dad done to embarrass us?" Sonia suggested as the three took out their phones and started searching the internet and social networking sites.

It only took about two seconds before they discovered the news story, it was the number three trending story on Gryzzl Blast.

"Good lord," Sonia and Wesley both exclaimed, "Ewww."

Wesley began reading the story, in giant bold letters the title read, **"Cab Driver Confessions: Congressman Wyatt Once Paid a Cab Driver Off. According to the Pawnee Sun the congressman and a blonde woman paid a Pawnee cab driver $1000 to Hook Up in the backseat of a cab. Who was this mystery woman?**

Sonia then began reading the article, which was in much smaller print, "Apparently, the cab driver was offered a sum that he couldn't refuse. He just wanted to live the American dream and put his kids through college. So who was this mystery woman? "It was that lady running for governor Leslie Knope," claims the cabbie. "She brought wine and brownies. If I remember right it was their engagement party." Were the brownies pot brownies? I guess we'll never know."

"There's another story with the title, **"Governor Candidate Knope Caught Hooking Up With A Mystery Man. Were Boos and Pot involved?**

"That's disgusting," Sonia whispered, "Mom and dad "hooking up."

"And those articles are such gossip and they're just trying to sensationalize and start rumors."

"You're right Wes."

"I'm sure the pot brownies is totally false. The wine is probably true. Definitely true. And as for the "hooking up" part, like….um…..good lord," Sonia muttered.

"Eww, no wonder mom and dad had triplets," Stephen grimaced causing Sonia and Wesley give each other bewildered looks as to the cluelessness of their brother.

"We really need to get to lunch," Stephen stated as he began walking towards the cafeteria, "Eww."

Wesley and Sonia followed in step behind him, "People really don't understand science," Wesley whispered.

Later that day, after a long day of overhearing whispers and feelings stares, the triplets returned home. They were relieved to be home but also dreading the awkward conversation they were bound to have with their parents about the breaking news concerning them.

Luckily, they were able to avoid the topic but then they were called to dinner.

"So kids how was school today? Anything out of the ordinary? What's the gossip down in gossip town?" Of course their mom would awkwardly try to get straight to the subject as their dad busied himself with putting the food on the table while he tried not to look panicked making him look sweaty and a bit crazed.

"Nope, nothing unusual," Sonia stated with Wesley nodding along in agreement and Stephen began stuffing his face with food.

"Everything's coolio beans. Nothing gross did we hear about anything ever."

"Oh, okay. So it's come to our attention that some stories have come out. About me and your dad. This is very common. When you're the children of public figures especially politicians people gossip, they say cruel things, lie, and slander. It's going to be really bad this year because both daddy and I are running for office. When you were younger it was easier to shield you. But you guys are growing up," Leslie then started to tear up as she did anytime the phrase growing up was used in reference to the triplets."

"….And your classmates will be talking about things and you need to know how to deal with it," Ben supplied, "And this is an election year for me and your mom is running for governor so there's going to be a lot of gossip this year.

"So," Leslie said clearing her throat, "Have you heard the story that's going around about your dad and me?"

Sonia and Wesley exchanged looks of dread while Stephen confessed, "Yep, we heard the story going around…..about you and dad….with each other…or other people…and beverages and food….and cabs…," while confessing Stephen was simultaneously stuffing his face with food.

"Okay. Well, your dad and I want to be honest with you. And if you ever have any questions you can always come to us or your grandparents or Andy and April, well maybe not Andy depends on the circumstances. So the story you heard about the cab and us paying to….uh…..spend some time in it….."

"Is a great example of media that sensationalizes stories and serves to gossip rather than inform," Ben pointed out.

"Yes, that's true and a great point honey. Now as for the truth of the story….some of it is based in truth but it's really rather…..blown out of proportion. So we're going to be upfront and honest. You know how your grandparents, your dad's parents, don't really have much of a relationship or get along. Well, they can make for a stressful evening. So we were very stressed and acted as we may not usually act. Your dad paid a cab one hundred dollars to wait outside and take us away. But you shouldn't run from your problems or drive away. So I may have got some wine, in case we got thirsty, and some brownies, they were just regular brownies. I mean they were mind blowing and amazing but that's just because I make excellent brownies. There was no pot in them," Leslie said pointing to emphasize her points.

Ben then spoke, "We've never done pot. I don't have any pot on me. We never did pot because when we were growing up it was illegal and you couldn't be elected to office if you had done pot and why would you not want to be in control of yourself. Pot equals lack of control over yourself. Do not do pot."

"So, pot is bad but alcohol is okay," Stephen said nodding causing Ben and Leslie to give each other a mutual look that said we need to talk about this kid later.

"As I was saying," Leslie began, "It was the night of our engagement party so we were so excited and stressed from Grandma and Grandpa and love, it's like a drug. So we may have hooked up if that means made out, in the backseat of the cab. Not hookup if that means sex. And we were adults that were engaged. Engaged to be married."

"We were in our late thirties."

"In a healthy adult relationship it is important to express your love physically and have fun together. It's natural."

"Oh god," Wesley and Sonia voiced as they looked down at the table while Stephen continued eating and Ben tried to frantically signal to Leslie that she was in dangerous oversharing territory.

"And we may have paid the cab driver another hundred so we could makeout," Leslie said her voice low.

"There was no one thousand dollars," Ben adamantly stated as if that made the situation better.

"But the cab driver was okay with it. He seemed totally cool with it. Not in a creepy way. Or desperate for money way. Just in a….cool way…." Leslie explained.

"So that clears up the rumor. Now we should talk about how you deal with these things."

"Joe Biden, Kirsten Gillibrand, and Auntie Madeline Albright have given your father and I some great advice about raising kids and being in politics," Leslie beamed.

"Yeah, um it's best to just take pride in the fact that you know the truth and acknowledge that you can't control what other people think."

"You have to make peace with those things or you'll drive yourself crazy. And you can always talk to your father and I about anything. Absolutely anything."

"And you shouldn't hit anyone just because they're talking smack about your family," Stephen shared causing Wesley and Sonia to send him a sharp look.

"Yeah, you should never hit anyone."

"By the way um," Ben stuttered looking at Leslie to help him out.

"There was once an incident when a man called me the second worst word for a woman and your father may have hit him. That story came out the first election dad ran in and then the first couple times he ran for reelection but I guess the media got tired of that story. It's unfortunate almost, because the article said I was an excellent bowler, almost."

"Also your mother may have…..shoved a… pie in someone's face…a candidate's wife…. that first time I ran for reelection."

"She had flicked pie at me first and the things she said about…..but I shouldn't have done those things."

"What's the first worst word a woman can be called and for clarification what's the second word?" Stephen inquired.

"So how did you all find out about the story?"

"Well, we may have heard some kids whispering about it at school," Sonia answered their mother's question.

"And how did that make you feel?"

"Mostly disgusted," Stephen mused causing Sonia to explain.

"What he means is that gossip is awful and the media should be covering real stories and um…"

Wesley cut in, "It's not great to hear about your parents being….amorous."

"And how much money they'll pay to be amorous," Stephen said laughing causing everyone at the dinner table to shoot him a look.

"So do you have any questions?" Ben inquired.

All three kids shook their heads no.

"Okay," Ben and Leslie nodded in relief as normal dinner conversation took over. This year it was rare that all five members of the Wyatt Knope family were under the same roof. The kids were busy with school and extracurricular activities. Leslie had taken a leave of absence from the Interior to concentrate on running for office and was going back and forth from their home base in DC to Indiana campaigning for governor and Ben was also running for reelection in the House and splitting his time between the two cities. If Leslie won, and it looked like she would, the plan was for their home base to be in Pawnee. But for the last semester of eighth grade Ben's mom and Leslie's mom would trade places staying in DC with the kids when Ben had to be in Indiana along with Leslie frequently visiting and the triplets could start their freshman year of high school in Pawnee, where thanks to high speed trains, Leslie could easily commute to the statehouse.

"So this three day weekend coming up we're all headed to Indiana. Your mom is headed to campaign in the Fort Wayne area and I'm campaigning in Sterling talking to local farmers so who wants to go with who?"

"I want to go to Fort Wayne with mom as long as we can stop and see the giant bowling pin there," Stephen bargained, to which Leslie replied, "I wouldn't even want to campaign there if I didn't get to stop to see the giant bowling pin."

 **Up Next: Embarrassing Parents Stay Embarrassing (Makin the Late Night Monologues)**


	6. Embarrassing Parents Stay Embarrassing

**Chapter 6: Embarrassing Parents Stay Embarrassing (Makin the Late Night Monologues)**

 **November 2032- Age 17- Pawnee- Embarrassing Parents Stay Embarrassing**

"Of course, the election of 2032 is only a few days away. This election has been rife with scandal and embarrassing fallouts. Senator Barnett in Arizona, who is running for reelection, has had to deal with scandal. He had an affair with his dog walker, an affair and made a sex tape with his wife's yoga instructor, and one of his businesses, a massage parlor, is being investigated for allegedly being a brothel. His wife and her yoga instructor were just arrested for suspected arson and attempted murder because the senator's home was set on fire when he was sleeping inside. Meanwhile, in Indiana incumbent Governor Knope has been under, scrutiny is the wrong word, I don't know what to call it. But some "weird things" have come out concerning her marriage to one of the state's representative's Ben Wyatt. Apparently, the two have checked into hotel rooms as James and Dolley Madison and Nicolas Sarkozy and Carla Bruni. Governor Knope sent a slideshow of pictures of her husband's butt to the Huffington Post in 2012. So much weird stuff is coming out about these two so I'm gonna save the rest of the jokes I have about them for the nights to come."

Sonia came out of her daze and slammed down her lap top screen. She reached for her phone but it was already vibrating with a call from Wesley.

"Did you just see….," they both said at the same time.

"Yeah, tomorrow at school is going to be so much fun."

"God why do mom and dad have to be so embarrassing?" Sonia lamented.

"I guess we should be grateful we're not the kids of that senator from Arizona. But…."

"Eww," they both grimaced.

"We definitely shouldn't watch late night tv during elections years. All seven Jimmy's are talking about it."

"Why hasn't Stephen said anything about this?"

"Meet me in his room."

Wesley and Sonia tiptoed into the hallway and lightly knocked on Stephen's door. When he did not answer they creeped inside to find Stephen asleep face down on his gryssal pad. Once again Stephen had missed everything.

 **Up Next: Some Things Never Change**


	7. Some Things Never Change

p class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;"strongChapter 7: Some Things Never Change/strong/p  
p class="MsoNormal"strong2035-College-20 yrs old/strong/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Up next, the latest scoop on Governor Knope and Congressman Wyatt's….um…..weird…embarrassing….I don't even know what to call it…..Up next on The Today Show."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Good lord, what have mom and dad done now," Sonia complained with Wesley joining her during their triplet three way call, "Or is this about something from the past coming out?"/p  
p class="MsoNormal""I long for the days when mom and dad's embarrassing behavior was only covered by the local news whether it be the Pawnee Sun, Perd Hapley, or Juan Callamezo."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""I thought when we all went our separate ways for college and left home that we'd have distance from our parent's embarrassing ways but no. Matt Freaking Lauer is talking about it on The Today Show."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""That dude is almost 80 years old and he's still on tv. Way to go Lauer," Stephen stated./p  
p class="MsoNormal""Once again you're missing the point Stephen," Sonia and Wesley shouted over the phone at the same time./p  
p class="MsoNormal""Oh, terrific. After the commercial break a marriage counselor is explaining why mom and dad have a great marriage and how their embarrassing scandals keep it fresh," Sonia explained. /p  
p class="MsoNormal""Okay, those are all positive words but you don't sound happy about," Stephen commented./p  
p class="MsoNormal""I'm being sarcastic. Yes, it's great mom and dad "keep it….fresh" but I don't want to hear about it while I eat my cereal shake I've lived it."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""I agree Sunny,"Wesley concurred./p  
p class="MsoNormal""I just feel like, mom and dad's marriage has taught me what a marriage should be like. And I weirdly aspire to have a marriage like theirs one day but at the same time they really gross me out."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Amen sister."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Do you have anything special going on today Stevie?"/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Yeah, I gotta test in Computer Science, communications class and English Lit, and after I'm gonna reward myself with a McRib. It's back. I've never had it before because it hasn't been "back" since before I was born. Apparently, they just figured out how to make it taste like it use to taste. They had a hard time because it's made from healthy free range meat now. Did you know our food supply use to be disgusting and so unhealthy? Anywhoo, I'm gonna see what all the fuss is. Uncle Andy told me it's amazballs."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Wow. And yeah, Stephen you should pay more attention in history class."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""What about you Sunny?"/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Well, I have an exam in my accounting class, a project due in my coding class, a college model UN meeting, tennis practice, I have to make some crafts for Galentines Day, practice for Debate, the professor in my history class is starting a lecture on The New Deal today, Mandarin class, and book club. You Wes?"/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Um, I gotta check on my experiment in lab, astronomy class tonight, I'm signing up for an archeological dig this summer, I gotta study for Mandarin class tomorrow, and I have back to back history and art history today."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""We'll all talk tonight? 7:30 work for you Sonia, 6:30 central for you Stephen?"/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Yep. I miss you guys."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Miss you too."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Oh, here's the story about mom and dad."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""What, did they just say…."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""They did…."/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Good Lord," the three shouted out in shock./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Some things never change./p  
p class="MsoNormal"The End: Please review: What was your favorite chapter? Did I miss any scandals?/p 


End file.
